The Art of Celebrating Aliveness

May 11, 2021

An abstract painting of a brush making a wiggly stroke.
Reading Time: 4 minutes

I’m so pleased to share with you my dear readers an interview I did with a soul sister of mine, Chrissy-Marie Tucciarone, for her podcast on iTunes and Spotify called The Art of Aliveness. We recorded this in early July, before started forty hours of healing apprenticeship and right after the release of my third book of poetry, My Heart’s Song. She asked me some great questions allowing me to share my healing journey thus far, with a huge concentration on my art.

I describe myself as a creative person because I feel my sensuality and drive come from my love for anything that helps me express myself in an artistic way including writing, dancing, yoga, painting, chanting, singing, music and now the shamanic healing sessions I conduct. I see the world in technicolor, orchestrated by a wide array of musical tastes from classical, jazz, R&B and Reggae, to EDM, Classic Rock and everything in between—i.e., The Grateful Dead. There’s really no beat I’ve ever met that I didn’t like. Being able to express myself artistically is like breathing for me. It’s how I roll.

An abstract painting of a brush making a wiggly stroke.

“The Chosen Path” by Anita Wexler

As I landed in Denver, on a layover from Idaho before flying to Fort Lauderdale, I saw a notification pop up on my cell from Chrissy telling me our episode was live on the podcast platforms! I bought some snacks, found a place to plug in, and started to listen. I must admit, this is my first ever interview on my own life’s story. I’ve been involved in other shows with my partner, because he’s a Super Bowl champion, but this was the first time I would speak from my heart on my own journey from darkness to light. It’s an overwhelming honor and I feel a lump in my throat just writing about it now.

Here’s the link. I invite all of you to have a listen! (Spotify installation not required on desktop, or download free on mobile.)

The episode was entitled, “Turning Your Sensitivities into Superpowers.” Here’s a strong segment, transcribed:

“All wounds stem from the illusion of separation from Source and of all Creation. The route of healing this wound is through cultivating love and compassion for every being on this planet, including oneself—not a bland standard of unquestioned acceptance, but a heartfelt sense of profound relatedness to whatever you perceive as apart from yourself. True compassion requires not only a feeling of warmth that emanates when you are in touch with your heart center, but in acts of kindness, even if this means being a fully attentive listener. Respect the fact that your heart is both a giver (putting out electrical energy) and a receiver (drawing in magnetic energy). These energies are best sensed by attending to the steady flow of your breathing while also noticing your heart center. Righteousness, fear, anger and judgement are some common ways to block one’s natural desire to love. Forgiveness is not only letting go of judgement, but also seeing through the illusion that you and All-That-Is are separate. Look about you and inside of you, and do your best to love whatever you see.”

In order to do this, I had to first forgive myself and welcome in many vital values we all require to thrive as human beings. I had been rejecting myself and needed to cultivate self love, trust and belief fifteen months ago, when I felt I could no longer carry the burden of being sexually abused. I had been wanting to get a tattoo of a semicolon (meaning) for some time now and I felt that I needed to get it done in Idaho.

In 2011, I found myself in a very dark place my dear readers. I felt so burdened by shame, guilt, unworthiness and hopelessness. I attempted to turn out my light completely. The main mission of my writing and the reason I became a shaman is to let others see what we can and do heal. My hope is fully restored and my life-force energy is extremely strong. The motto I live my life by is “triumphing over trauma” and today I proudly walk with my head held high. You are never alone my dears—ever!

September 10th was World Suicide Prevention Day and I put the semicolon on my middle finger as an everlasting statement and symbol to myself to remember where I came from and how profoundly impactful this healing journey has been. I got this the day after the final ritual ceremony, a full circle moment.

My heart is at peace, I am filled with joy, feeling 100% content with life. It’s a well-deserved place to be after the pain and heartache, the many lessons in life I learned the hard way. The pain from the human experience is something we are all continually healing from. It’s never-ending and everlasting while we walk this planet. I believe that each and everyone of us can and does heal in our own ways. It’s hardwired in our DNA. I’m honored and blessed to help others heal as I did.

As a shaman I help others connect to their own natural rhythm, retrieve their soul’s purpose and balance the chakra points in the body: our energy centers that govern our being, allowing us the most optimized functionality possible. This is my magic and what I’m meant to do.

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